Sitting, sprawling, on the couch last night, with her next to me. Her hand lightly on my hips, then over the crotch of my jeans. Sexy, painfully hot even, but not much direct contact that way.
Me: I realized today my favorite pants have always had a ton of room in the crotch. Leaving space for that phantasmic cock, I guess!
Her: Yeah, I’ve noticed that... is that why? Have you fantasized about what it would be like to have one?
Me: Oh my god, all the time. Doesn’t everyone?
And she just looks at me, that soft, tender look that seems to hold oceans of love and desire.
She’s known me this whole time, she’s really seen me right from the start, I think, never understanding though what it was that drove me to contort my outer self away from the inner self she could see so clearly. That’s another thing then that’s new, but getting used to it is an absolute pleasure: the looks of acknowledgement, validation, respect, and desire from all sorts of women, sometimes in the gay village area, sometimes where I least expect it. Thank you, every one of you, for handling this new visibility so gently and for making me feel like a sexy person for the first time in my whole life. I love every one of you for it.